Sunday, March 22, 2015

Walk With Me

It happened a couple of years ago and I'll never forget it.

One Sunday, as we were leaving church, Lilly ran up to me, tugged on my sleeve and exclaimed, "Mom! Mom! I have to show you something I made. It is really cool!"

She preceded to show me a book she had made in her little church class. It was titled, "Service Book."

 
She carefully turned the pages and described to me what each one was about. I quickly gathered that her precious book was about ways we can serve others.


Hey, that is a good one!


That's a good one too.


Oooh, I like this one a lot! I will always accept a treat.


So tender and sweet, right? I watched as Lilly turned the page to the very last suggestion listed in her charming "Service Book."


HELP MOM WALK!?!

"Do I walk funny?," I wondered. (And maybe I didn't want to know the answer to that!) "Do I stumble around a lot or trip often? Perhaps she is referring to when I am an old lady? And need help getting around?" I pondered and pondered and pondered.

Later, it donned on me, and I realized something powerful and profound:  That that is exactly what we do as women. We help each other walk. We sustain each other. We support each other. We uplift each other. We help each other walk in faith. We help each other walk in courage. We help each other walk the paths of forgiveness, patience, understanding, and love. We help each other walk when we are weary, downtrodden, or discouraged. We help each other walk when the path becomes dark and unknown.

And sometimes, when life becomes particularly painful and challenging, we carry each other.

I believe passionately and wholeheartedly in serving the women around me -- no matter who they are, where they come from, what they believe. They are my sisters. They could benefit from my service and from your service--great or small. A hug and a smile. A warm meal delivered on a rainy day. A nice card in the mail. You just never know the difference an act of kindness could make.

Elaine Jack, a brilliant and spiritual woman, said, "Reach out to each other. Hands often speak as voices can't. A warm embrace conveys volumes. A moment of sharing refreshes our souls."

You refresh my soul daily.


Thank you, thank you, thank you for walking this life and this journey with me.

Thursday, March 19, 2015

Engrish

It's a good day when you receive a package in the mail.

It's an even better day when that package contains your adorable, perfectly purple, portable battery charger. The size of a tube of lipstick, it's "a must-have" for your purse, for smart phone backup and emergencies.

And it becomes the BEST day when you discover that your battery is from China, and that all the "product warnings" on the back of the box have been translated from Chinese to English. Poorly translated.


(The following have been typed out EXACTLY as they appear on the box.)

Warning #1--Do not use of store under high temperature and wet environment. Hmm... What constitutes a "wet environment?" Is Seattle considered a wet environment? If so, those hipsters are going to have to go with a different product!

Warning #2--During using the battery, need to avoid falling down or extrusion, if cause any abnormal phenomenon, please stop use immediately. Abnormal phenomenon!?! Good grief, this one creeps me out! If my battery starts levitating or channeling other worlds, if it becomes a conduit to the land of the dead or starts talking to me, you can bet your sweet bottom I am going to STOP USING it IMMEDIATELY! And don't even get me started on the "need to avoid falling down" while using this product. Is that warning on the box because people do, in fact, fall down more frequently because of it? Good heavens, why? Is it an equilibrium shifter? I don't get it.

(Side note:  The definition of extrusion is, "something that bulges." If my battery starts bulging, I'm making a mad dash for my front door. Four words:  Sigourney Weaver in "Alien." Ew, ew, ew.)


Warning #3--If found any body change during using, please stop use immediately. What in the hell is going to happen to my body once I plug this baby in!?! People, I have enough problems as it is. I'm a busy mom, with a drama queen second grader, a special needs son, and a squishy, busy, naughty baby. I rock adult acne and my poor little belly button is deformed beyond recognition. I'm not even sure if I HAVE a belly button anymore! (Thanks, kids.) I DO NOT need to be worried about strange rashes and growing third eyeballs. Ain't nobody got time for that.

Warning #4--It is normal that the body temperature will be slightly high when charging. Say it with me now:  I do not want a fever, I do not want a fever, I do not want a fever...



Here's the thing, you guys... I have been to China. I have seen an abundance of poorly translated signs and ads. I have giggled at the sign at the Summer Palace that would indicate to tourists that "no smiling is allowed." It makes me ridiculously happy. My charger box and the aforementioned "warnings" printed on it make me ridiculously happy. Because they remind me of crazy and adventurous bus rides, The Great Wall, rice terraced villages, dumplings, riding the train, and shopping in the street markets. They remind me of good friends and great times in an extraordinary country. And they remind me of rice. Lots and lots of rice.

Hey! Who wants a super special, supernatural, fever-inducing charger?! Free for a brave soul who'd like to give it a good home. (Or die.)

I think I'll just keep the box.