Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Call Me A Contractor!

Question:  What do you get when your cute, pixie faced five-year-old poo poos an "adult sized" poo poo (EEEWW) in the toilet, clogs it with an additional half roll of toilet paper, flushes it, and then neglects to tell anyone that the contents are flooding the bathroom floor?  (And seeping into the hallway carpet, and settling into the master bedroom, and making it's way into the living room below via a collapsing ceiling?)   


Answer:  A.  Big.  Stinkin'.  Mess.  AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!

(Do you hear that?  That is the "snap" of a cold Diet Coke can being opened by my nimble fingers.  I've been opening a lot of them lately....I'm coping.)   


Thursday, May 24, 2012

What Do You Want To Be?

When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?


When I was little (and just as kooky as I am now), my sole ambition was to be She-Ra.  For a period of time, I imagined myself welding a sword and riding a winged horse.  When I grew tired of my "princess of power" dreams, I aspired to be a fashion designer.  I had a lined, spiral bound notebook that I filled with my drawings of clothes.  Most of them ball gowns.  All of them foofy and poofy.  By the time I was eight, I was moving on to bigger and better things...Modeling.

Yep, I wanted to be a model.  Looking back now, I can't quite understand why I desired such a thing.  I'm terrible in front of a camera.  My wardrobe has always been passe.  My nose has got a lot of personality, which the industry would probably regard as...well...big.  Alas, a future in modeling was tossed out the proverbial window faster than Naomi Campbell could toss a cell phone at a defenseless maid!

I had other ambitions:  School teacher.  Librarian.  Restaurant owner.  (What the heck?)  Dancer.  Dance teacher.  (People, I can't even dance well!)  Author.  School counselor.  Poet.  Actress.  A business woman.  (But only for the power suits, the sexy heels, and the expensive briefcases.)  When adults would ask me, "What do you want to be when you grow up?," my answer was always changing.

Last week, Lilly Mae was asked the same question by her preschool teachers.  Her school--as part of the curriculum--did a unit on careers.  Lilly's teachers invited a few parents to come into the classroom and talk about their jobs.  Lilly loved it!  When I picked her up from school, she ran up to me and said, "Mom!  Mom!  I know what I'm going to be when I grow up!"

"What, Lilly?," I asked.

"A mom."

  
I hope Lilly grows up knowing she can do anything.  With courage, determination, goals, and a game plan, she can be whoever she wants to be.  She can do whatever she wants to do.  With God, nothing is impossible.  The sky's the limit.  She can work hard and accomplish much.  I look into her pretty brown eyes and see all the potential for greatness.  She could be She-Ra or a teacher, a model or a chef.  She could be an athlete or a nurse, a writer or a business owner.  And, of course, she could be a mother.  If that is one of the jobs she decides she wants (in twenty-five years), then I would have to tell her:

My darling, excellent choice!
Being a mother is the greatest and most important job of all!