So there I was, working on my Smash book, basking in the long overdue silence that only seems to come at nighttime at my house. I turned to a fresh, unmarred new page and was met with the most delightful, polka-dot scrapbook paper. There, smack dab in the middle of the page, was a doll-like image of a girl. Beneath her feet were the words, "A is for......."
Hmm? What to do, what to do? What to do with this page? A is for....? Hmm?
Then it smacked me (kind of like how Cam did when he smacked me in the face with my checkbook...but this is figurative, of course...): A IS FOR ALEISHA!
I'll devote a whole page to myself, I thought. I'll list nice words that describe me; adjectives for my awesomeness! WAIT! WHAT? No! That's silly. A page all about me and my characteristics!? Why would I do that?
And then, my friends, an epiphany smacked me again: Why WOULDN'T I do that!
As women, we are superfluously hard on ourselves. We are our own worst critiques. We bombard our extraordinary selves with negative thoughts of...well...crap. I'm not good enough. I'm not thin enough. I'm not smart enough. I'm not as good of a mother as she is. I'm not as talented as she is. I'm not pretty. I'm not this and that and blah, blah, blah! Why? Why, why, why do we do that? Why do we beat ourselves up? Why are we so fastidious in our quest to mangle our self esteems? When in actuality, we are inherently glorious and amazing. WE ARE! We are women! We are creatures of love, compassion, selflessness, and beauty. We can walk tall knowing there is no one else like us, no one better than us, no one who can take our necessary places in this beautiful world.
You bet your sweet bippy I dedicated a page to myself in my book! I thought long and hard about the adjectives I wanted to use to describe myself. I searched my heart, reminded myself of who I know I am, and started to write. Here are some of my words:
creative kind funny romantic quirky sensitive poetic smart well-read
nice friendly silly happy talented loving sassy spiritual sentimental
thoughtful loveable fun hilarious goal-oriented good compassionate
real faithful authentic strong interesting brave unique witty loyal
artistic spunky religious sincere sweet eccentric well-rounded motivated
special grateful crafty bubbly divine joyful memorable WORTHWHILE
I AM worthwhile, and YOU are worthwhile. Sometimes--and always at low times--we need to remember that. We need to remember how great we truly are.
Here's my "Mama Leisha" challenge for you (and if you didn't know I was issuing a challenge when you started reading this post...well, then....SURPRISE!): Write down the adjectives that best describe you. Use good words. Be kind to yourself. Put it down on paper and make it tangible. Believe what you write. Refer to it often. I know it will bring sunshine into your life when the clouds of self doubt and loathing start to roll in. It will make your heart happy.
What are you waiting for?!
GO DO IT!